8 days left of teaching my students

Seriously. 8 days. That is... nothing. And then I will no longer teach for my school. It is simultaneously saddening and SO exciting. I am at wits end this time of year. I find that I become more insulting and more easily pissed off at kids, for 2 reasons really: 1. They have decided that they are just done learning, and it is such a struggle to try to get them to understand anything, and 2. I also have kind of decided that I am done and all I can think about are the things I have to look forward to this summer. Seriously. This makes for an easily distracted teacher. 

The saddening part is that I actually love most of my kids. They make me laugh, smile, scream, want to punch them all in the face, feel joy and accomplishment for them, etc. I will miss yelling at them. I will miss throwing pens at them when they are talking while I am talking. I will miss hearing about the dramas of their lives, and OMG guess who is dating whom?! (except they don't say whom...). I will miss sharing my life with them, hoping in vain that they might learn something from my experiences (most won't... most need to do it themselves to learn). I will just miss them. 

They have hired a replacement for me. Now I don't even have a job to come back to, even if I wanted to.

I thought I would be freaking out at this point. Way back, when CB first proposed and we knew for sure that I would be uprooting my life to move to be with him, I just knew that I was going to be a mess about all of this. I hate change. I always have. When I graduated from college I went on to experience the worst summer of my life. The change of moving out of a dorm and into an apartment alone. CB moving away to DC- after having spent 7 months seeing each other every day, living next door to one another... UGH. I HATED summer 2007. Since that summer had a lot of change, and so does this one... I figured I would probably hate this too. 

But I don't. 

I have no apprehensions about marrying CB. I thought I would, given my parents' wretched divorce and the fact I have never personally witnessed a successful marriage.

I could marry CB tomorrow and not think twice about it. Call me naive or what you will, but I do not care, nor would I think that maybe you had a point. You do not have a point. I am not naive. I just know that CB is it for me. The end. 

CB has no apprehensions about being married to me. He is not the 'dying to be a bachelor for his whole life and omg is this the last girl I'm going to kiss/date/.....' type. Naturally, I appreciate this.  He is extraordinarily excited about all of this.

I thought I would be absolutely depressed about leaving my city, my job, my family, and my teacher friends, and while these things certainly are sad, I am okay. My friends lives are changing. It was about time that my life change too. 

More than anything I am SO excited for these changes. I am excited to experience something new. I am not freaking out. I am ecstatic. 

Tomorrow I depart for SA. We are perusing 8 houses, eating great mexican food, and playing tourists on a popular walk with a river. 

YAY : ) 

PS: CB is done with his 2nd year of medical school tomorrow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YAY for the academic portion of medical school being OVER.  And, interesting/horrifying fact... If you were to calculate his 'hours', so to speak, per academic period... they are taking roughly 60 hours/week of classes. (pathology alone was 14 hours a week... shoot me in the face.)